Accident ahead, apparently. Could it be caused by a reckless driver
a) colliding with a street biker changing lanes on the highway
b) operating heavy machinery whilst stoned
c) distracted by vegan, gluten-free, organic food cart wrap dripping on his burlap tie
d) looking up the nearest vintage furniture store on her smart phone to continue search for ugly sofa
Surprise, surprise! None of the above! I eventually pull up to the scene of the crime to witness two lanes of highway traffic on a shoulderless bridge blocked by none other than an entire BOAT! A boat!
The boat is flanked by a small group of men scratching their heads, wondering how on earth they will move said boat.
I miss my appointment, telling the receptionist, "Sorry, I was stuck in traffic. Some guy's boat fell off his trailer in the middle of the highway." She's very understanding. On my way home after getting sandwiches at Jimmy John's, like an hour later, I hear the traffic report. It says there's a boat [still] blocking two lanes of traffic on the Glenn Jackson Bridge near Government Island.
How do you move a 24-foot boat off a bridge? Push it over the edge? Rent a crane? Sail it away? Welcome to Portland.
1 comments:
Hilarious. One of these days we need to cross paths, you know, when I'm in Portland for more than 24 hrs.
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